Friday, January 30, 2004

Okay, so it's Friday night and my car still won't start. It's like a block of ice. I need to thaw it out somehow. My family came out tonight with my old car warmer, so we stuck it in the engine, covered it with blankets, and closed the hood. I'm hoping by morning I'll be able to get it going.

If that doesn't work the only thing that will work is to find a warm place to keep it for a little while. So I guess I'm asking all you locals.... does anyone have such a place? I can get it towed there, and keep it there just long enough for the bugger to start. Then I'll get lost. I'm hoping to have it running by saturday afternoon, as I promised my friend I'd help her move.

So if anyone thinks they can help me out, I'd love to get in contact with you.

Thursday, January 29, 2004

This morning it was -52 degrees celsius.


I mean..... bloody hell.... what the f........ come on now..... why?

I'm reading.... or was reading.... an interesting book about geological evidence regarding a universal flood in the history of earth. It theorizes that the earth's axis used to be straight.... that is, it wasn't tilted at the angle it is now. This supports the fossils found that suggest that a sub-tropical climate used to cover the entire earth.

Even Canada. That's right, God used to like Canada. Back when there were no Europeans inhabiting it.

I guess what happened was a cataclysmic global event knocked the planet off it's axis and Canadians have been freezing their buns off ever since.

It's a good book, while I'm on the topic. Presents a lot of ideas to satisfy the nagging questions that any thinking human probably has about a story as unlikely as the biblical flood. For example..... given the sheer enormity of the planet, how is it possible that two of every species alive made their way to Noah? That seems rather unlikely.... don't you think. And don't give me none of your faith pat answers. I don't need them because I have a scientific explanation.

You and I both know that there is a certain amount of truth to the theory of evolution, that is to say, that species change and adapt to their environment. Polar bears have adapted to the arctic. So it's probably safe to say that Polar Bears didn't exist before the flood. They'd have baked. And since the climate was the same everywhere, it's probably safe to say that a healthy cross section of the world's animals existed in any give region.

That is to say, Noah probably didn't need a Grizzly Bear, a Kodiak Bear, a Kermode Bear, AND a Polar Bear. He just needed one pair of bears. And take lemurs for example...... do you think Noah really needed a set of Ring Tailed Lemurs, Red Ruffed Lemurs... the other kinds of lemurs? Probably just a pair of any given Lemurs. And think about all the animals that were created from domestic breeding. Poodles (we know God wasn't responsible for THAT) and Siamese Fighting Fish. Persian Cats. They say every dog in the world descended from the Alaskan Wolf. Do you know how many species that makes space for in the ark? LOTS.

So many things to think about, in respect to the flood. I should get back to that book. Pizza's on it's way. I'm hungry. goodbye.

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

Hmmmmm..... I got nothing.

Nothing to say, that is.

I mean, I probably have something to say, but I'm sure somewhere along the line I've already said it. Not that I mind repeating myself.....

It's just that everything about this day has been nondescript. It was cold, there was snow, there was work, there was Prince of Persia: the sands of time, there was leftover rice and tuna. Then I sat down to write this and chat a bit and in a few minutes I'll be going to bed. Early. Again.

Last night I dreamt I was in Africa. A small village with an excellent shopping center. I had forgotten my camera and notebook, so I was looking to buy some paper and a pencil, but everything was in excess of 2000 Kwatcha!! Totally unrealistic price. It was warm. The sun was shining. There were grass thatched huts, lean-to's made of sticks..... Africans..... lots of Africans.

I hope I dream that dream again. Goodnight.

Monday, January 26, 2004

All I wanted was a can of tuna.

So I did what any reasonable person would have done. I drove to the cornerstore to get some. The corner store that I frequent is tiny and kinda ratty looking. The floor is made of plywood, the coolers are really loud, it's not air conditioned in the summer. It's owned by a couple who lives in the back. I try to get what I can there due to my aversion to large corporations (problem is, large corporations got everything you need in one place)..... but all I needed was a can of tuna. So I went to the cornerstore.

I walked in and the woman was manning the cashier, talking to a customer. I strolled on back to where I saw the canned goods, and started inspecting the canned tuna. I saw chunked, but I wanted flaked...... oh there's flaked, but it's some low fat concoction.... can't use that.....

"Hey..... come here." I turned around to see the man standing there with his fly wide open, glaring at me from behind some boxes. I turned to face him but didn't go closer. "Who are you?" He asked.

Well now, there's a good question, I thought to myself, which answer do you suppose he's looking for? I could tell him who I am but that would mean nothing to him since he doesn't know me..... which is why he's asking me who I am...... I guess...... kind of a vicious cycle..... so I settled on "I live down the street."

His face didn't change but his voice took on a whispery sort of hissing as he responded, "Get Out"

Whereupon I said the only appropriate thing.

"Excuse me?"

I'm thinking, holy shit, this guy's on something bad, so I motored towards the front where the woman is looking back at me in confusion.

She says, "what can I help you with?"
The absurdity of the question kinda threw me off..... I mean, for starters, could you get your husband a rabies shot? Maybe tie him up during business hours? Had I said anything, it wouldn't have been heard, because he was still yelling about how I should get out.

"Don't mind him," she says, "What do you need?"
"Uh..... a can of tuna?"
"Oh no, we don't have that."

Which of course was a lie, designed to get me out of the store as quickly as possible. As I left, I heard her yelling at him, "What's wrong with you?"

So I went to Safeway. Thwarted again.

Sunday, January 25, 2004

Well now, this has been a mostly productive day.

I managed to do some laundry, and then took myself down to the zoo to hang out in the tropical house. That was nice, and made me feel better, though it wasn't quite what the doctor ordered. It doesn't smell quite right in there, and Kookaburras shouldn't be in cages while doves fly free. Nevertheless, I took off my sweater and mitts and strolled around..... around and around in my t-shirt, listening to the birds sing and searching for feathers. I noticed a nice sitting spot up high on some of the fake rocks, but I figured I'd get kicked out if I climbed up there.

I wasn't there long before they closed, so I drove through the park to the Conservatory, where they have two large greenhouses complete with benches and a restaurant. For another half hour I strolled between Norfolk Island Pines and Banana trees, Amazon lilies, and some hanging monstrosity that looked like a gigantic pine cone shaped tumor with long green leaves sprouting out of it.

Standing between the two Norfolk Pine trees, I marvelled at their coloring. They looked so fake. The needles looked like rubber. So making sure no one was looking, I plucked a tiny needled twig from a larger branch. Instantly the aroma of pine trees reached me, and as I inspected the broken end of the twig, I concluded that, strangely enough, they had indeed coaxed a majestic pine to crouch in that tiny glass cage.

I thought, how wonderful it would be if this was my house. No walls, no doors, no stairs. Just trees, inside, and birds, and I'd build my bed over there on that outcropping of volcanic rocks, where I could see everything. And beside my bed would grow a banana tree, from which I would pluck my breakfast each morning. The chirping of crickets would sing me to sleep and the morning doves would wake me, and each night I would lay on my back in my bed and breathe in pine and exhale bliss, watch the stars turn above the glass ceiling.

On my way out I passed a wishing pond with goldfish and turtles. A couple standing beside me was tossing coins in. I waited till they left, and then tossed in a penny, making a wish. Then on second thought, I tossed in a dime, making the same wish.

A wish that comes true, after all, is worth a great deal more than a penny.
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