"Kingdom of God" is very important and pivotal, and let me tell you why. I've only recently discovered that though I've heard the phrase quite often, particularly since joining the Vineyard, no one ever really seems to draw any attention to what the term actually implies. Since I see that there is a need in this area, allow me to get the ball rolling.

A Kingdom is a realm which is ruled over by a King. A King is an individual who is in charge to the point where He can command you to jump on one foot while barking like a bichon frise and then lop off your head on a whim, without being questioned. A King has the power of life and death and makes all the rules. Leaders of democratic countries refer to such people as tyrants, and drop bombs on their civilian subjects.

"The Kingdom of God" would therefore imply both of two things, that the Kingdom of God is where God is King, and that in the tradition of Kingdoms, God has the power of life and death and pretty much everything else in the kingdom which is where He is King.

If you think I'm being redundant, I assure you I'm not. Something which has not been hammered into my brain is the Lordship of Jesus. The fact that salvation is not the entirety of the gospel, but rather the result of bringing oneself under the Lordship of God, who is the King.

So here's a question. How much do I trust the character of the One I call King? Do I believe what He says when He says that His kingdom is a place where the sick are made well and the blind can see and justice reigns and everyone reaps exactly what they sow? Do I believe that the Kingdom of God is a place where I am loved and safe and surrounded and secure? Do I believe that the King therein is kind and caring and concerned for the best interests of all His subjects? Or do I think that God, like all tyrants, will exercise His power to make me look silly and then break my kneecaps?

Does the Kingdom of God rule in my life, and therefore everywhere I go? How can I be sure that it does? What would change if it did? What would be the end result? What prevents me from ensuring that it does? How does one go about resolving the matter of God's Lordship in their lives?

I somehow feel that placing emphasis on this point, which quite frankly makes me a little uncomfortable, might make a lot of difference for a lot of people. After all, if I not only love God with all my heart, but also honestly and truly submit myself to His lordship, will my behaviour easily deviate from the standards He has set?

I suspect not.

So..... the Kingdom of God is not a democracy, it's a theocracy, a tyranny, there's only one individual in charge, and His name is God. Democracy is to the kingdom of God as postmodernism is to fundamentalism (I don't know much about either of those two things so please forgive inconsistencies in my comparison, I'm not a geek like you, after all).

A certain unnamed president is working very hard at spreading democracy. I have no choice but to conclude that this individual is battling AGAINST the Kingdom of God. Take that, Religious Right!!

That's a joke, by the way.

The Kingdom of God is not a democracy.

Discuss.

Well....

I've been working on my guitar, and watching movies, as per usual. I've been stuck on a thought that I can't quite pinpoint, and I've been stuck in my head. Perhaps it's just part of this transition that I've been going through, that started nearly a year ago.

It'll be my birthday soon. This time last year my stepmother was trying to kill herself and my dad was at the end of his rope. My brother was wetting the bed. My dog was a fetus inside the dog that lived in the house that was becoming less of a home every day. I was working myself to the bone and still couldn't afford enough nourishment to prevent my hair from falling out. On year ago, life was the shits, and I remember sitting in my car with one fist against the roof, and one palm against the window, and my feet pushing on the floorboards, feeling so trapped but hoping that if I could just push hard enough then my cage would fall apart and I could find myself in an alternate life where I did get to eat every day, and I wasn't responsible for the emotional well-being of my family members, and I did have a place to call home.

I remember my simple prayer of frustration. I just need help. Something has to change, and I can't effect that change. I'm stuck, and I just need help.

One year later, my dog is full grown, and beautiful. We live together in a house that is our home. My family is just far enough away that running to the rescue is no longer an option. I buy fruit, and take vitamin supplements, and I feel healthy, and I work only one job, and it pays better than any other job I've ever worked. I have everything I need or want.

I can hardly believe it's been a whole year. When you're in transition it seems to take so long, and it feels so torturous, but when you look back you can hardly believe the ways that things are different, and the thing is that I know the transition isn't finished. I feel unsettled and discombobulated but I don't know why, except that I know that so many things are changing, and I don't know how long it will take.

I think that the only scrap of discontent that I have is the suspense, the curiosity about a future that seems so close and yet so long in coming. But I have to remind myself not to be in a hurry, to learn everything I need to learn at this time, and learn it well, and enjoy the scenery and relax.

God is good, and He is trustworthy, which I suppose is why I feel curiosity instead of apprehension. I know that He's got good things in store, and I've learned in the past that He is a faithful guide.