When I started this blog, I did so on the premise that I would be painfully honest. I decided that this would be a place, perhaps the only place, where I would bare it all. As time went by and more people who knew me started reading, I had to be a little more selective, choosing not to write about certain topics, but staying as raw as I could and taking whatever chances that involved. I understood that there are risks involved with posting any kind of personal information on the internet.
For example, with a bit of notetaking and dedication, there at least a couple of bloggers out there that I could track down, pop out of some hedges and yell "BOO!!!" Shortly after I'd be arrested for stalking or tracking or something. Similarly, anyone as obsessive as myself would have no trouble extracting from my archives the global coordinates of my various haunts. My church, for example. Couple this information with pictures, and I am indeed a naiive fool. But I'm not the only one, so it's okay. After all, who cares where I live, where I go to church, or where I drop in for coffee?
By all indications, no one.
But as bloggers we share with one another the things on our hearts and the thoughts in our heads, and this is the information that draws us together. For this reason I hold steadfastly to my theory that absolute vulnerability is the only reason I have for writing. Anything less is pointless...... mediocrity is not something I aspire to, although I achieve it so frequently......
The point is that every once in a while I get an email from a random cybersurfer that makes me stop and wonder if I'm not wasting my time. Do I really come across that way? Have I truly failed at articulating myself? Am I opening myself up to unsolicited advice from those who typically have no more than a week of background information? Why do I do this......just to remind myself...... why do I blog?
Perhaps it's just my personality, but few things bother me as much as feeling misunderstood. So days like today when I ponder my response, I wonder about all the others I haven't heard from...... have they misunderstood me as well? Am I failing to communicate?
I don't believe so. I'm trying to remember the positive feedback I've recieved. I'm trying to focus on those who know me better. I'm trying not to let it bother me.
Since my last post I've found myself being very oversensitive and irritable. What's bugging me? I should find out.
For example, with a bit of notetaking and dedication, there at least a couple of bloggers out there that I could track down, pop out of some hedges and yell "BOO!!!" Shortly after I'd be arrested for stalking or tracking or something. Similarly, anyone as obsessive as myself would have no trouble extracting from my archives the global coordinates of my various haunts. My church, for example. Couple this information with pictures, and I am indeed a naiive fool. But I'm not the only one, so it's okay. After all, who cares where I live, where I go to church, or where I drop in for coffee?
By all indications, no one.
But as bloggers we share with one another the things on our hearts and the thoughts in our heads, and this is the information that draws us together. For this reason I hold steadfastly to my theory that absolute vulnerability is the only reason I have for writing. Anything less is pointless...... mediocrity is not something I aspire to, although I achieve it so frequently......
The point is that every once in a while I get an email from a random cybersurfer that makes me stop and wonder if I'm not wasting my time. Do I really come across that way? Have I truly failed at articulating myself? Am I opening myself up to unsolicited advice from those who typically have no more than a week of background information? Why do I do this......just to remind myself...... why do I blog?
Perhaps it's just my personality, but few things bother me as much as feeling misunderstood. So days like today when I ponder my response, I wonder about all the others I haven't heard from...... have they misunderstood me as well? Am I failing to communicate?
I don't believe so. I'm trying to remember the positive feedback I've recieved. I'm trying to focus on those who know me better. I'm trying not to let it bother me.
Since my last post I've found myself being very oversensitive and irritable. What's bugging me? I should find out.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home